@font-face{font-family:Permanent Marker;font-style:normal;font-display:swap;font-weight:400;src:url(/assets/permanent-marker-latin-400-normal-BF23djCy.woff2) format("woff2"),url(/assets/permanent-marker-latin-400-normal-BnZj5c41.woff) format("woff");unicode-range:U+0000-00FF,U+0131,U+0152-0153,U+02BB-02BC,U+02C6,U+02DA,U+02DC,U+0304,U+0308,U+0329,U+2000-206F,U+20AC,U+2122,U+2191,U+2193,U+2212,U+2215,U+FEFF,U+FFFD}@font-face{font-family:Patrick Hand;font-style:normal;font-display:swap;font-weight:400;src:url(/assets/patrick-hand-vietnamese-400-normal-65jA92mZ.woff2) format("woff2"),url(/assets/patrick-hand-vietnamese-400-normal-CZjY324Y.woff) format("woff");unicode-range:U+0102-0103,U+0110-0111,U+0128-0129,U+0168-0169,U+01A0-01A1,U+01AF-01B0,U+0300-0301,U+0303-0304,U+0308-0309,U+0323,U+0329,U+1EA0-1EF9,U+20AB}@font-face{font-family:Patrick Hand;font-style:normal;font-display:swap;font-weight:400;src:url(/assets/patrick-hand-latin-ext-400-normal-Dno5CMlI.woff2) format("woff2"),url(/assets/patrick-hand-latin-ext-400-normal-C2ywpnn3.woff) format("woff");unicode-range:U+0100-02BA,U+02BD-02C5,U+02C7-02CC,U+02CE-02D7,U+02DD-02FF,U+0304,U+0308,U+0329,U+1D00-1DBF,U+1E00-1E9F,U+1EF2-1EFF,U+2020,U+20A0-20AB,U+20AD-20C0,U+2113,U+2C60-2C7F,U+A720-A7FF}@font-face{font-family:Patrick Hand;font-style:normal;font-display:swap;font-weight:400;src:url(/assets/patrick-hand-latin-400-normal-B7HHA2Vw.woff2) format("woff2"),url(/assets/patrick-hand-latin-400-normal-Df9_VoRQ.woff) format("woff");unicode-range:U+0000-00FF,U+0131,U+0152-0153,U+02BB-02BC,U+02C6,U+02DA,U+02DC,U+0304,U+0308,U+0329,U+2000-206F,U+20AC,U+2122,U+2191,U+2193,U+2212,U+2215,U+FEFF,U+FFFD}@font-face{font-family:Kalam;font-style:normal;font-display:swap;font-weight:700;src:url(/assets/kalam-devanagari-700-normal-BeU_-hjz.woff2) format("woff2"),url(/assets/kalam-devanagari-700-normal-B52CSkpd.woff) format("woff");unicode-range:U+0900-097F,U+1CD0-1CF9,U+200C-200D,U+20A8,U+20B9,U+20F0,U+25CC,U+A830-A839,U+A8E0-A8FF,U+11B00-11B09}@font-face{font-family:Kalam;font-style:normal;font-display:swap;font-weight:700;src:url(/assets/kalam-latin-ext-700-normal-CwgfRD_T.woff2) format("woff2"),url(/assets/kalam-latin-ext-700-normal-BA-KJHgr.woff) format("woff");unicode-range:U+0100-02BA,U+02BD-02C5,U+02C7-02CC,U+02CE-02D7,U+02DD-02FF,U+0304,U+0308,U+0329,U+1D00-1DBF,U+1E00-1E9F,U+1EF2-1EFF,U+2020,U+20A0-20AB,U+20AD-20C0,U+2113,U+2C60-2C7F,U+A720-A7FF}@font-face{font-family:Kalam;font-style:normal;font-display:swap;font-weight:700;src:url(/assets/kalam-latin-700-normal-D2H-9ISU.woff2) format("woff2"),url(/assets/kalam-latin-700-normal-7TSuSrjP.woff) format("woff");unicode-range:U+0000-00FF,U+0131,U+0152-0153,U+02BB-02BC,U+02C6,U+02DA,U+02DC,U+0304,U+0308,U+0329,U+2000-206F,U+20AC,U+2122,U+2191,U+2193,U+2212,U+2215,U+FEFF,U+FFFD}:root{--paper: #F4EDDC;--paper-2: #EAE0C8;--ink: #1B1712;--ink-soft: #4a4236;--fur: #EE7A2E;--fur-deep: #D9601C;--ear: #7FB23A;--ear-deep: #5C8F24;--red: #E23B3B;--purple: #7B4FB8;--gold: #F2B233;--pen: #2F3A8F;--s1: 8px;--s2: 16px;--s3: 24px;--s4: 40px;--s5: 64px;--wobbly: 255px 15px 225px 15px / 15px 225px 15px 255px;--wobbly-2: 15px 255px 15px 225px / 225px 15px 255px 15px;color-scheme:light}*,*:before,*:after{box-sizing:border-box}html{scroll-behavior:smooth}@media (prefers-reduced-motion: reduce){html{scroll-behavior:auto}}body{margin:0;color:var(--ink);background-color:var(--paper);background-image:radial-gradient(ellipse 40% 30% at 12% 70%,rgba(217,96,28,.05),transparent 70%),radial-gradient(ellipse 30% 25% at 88% 18%,rgba(47,58,143,.04),transparent 70%),url("data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2000/svg' width='220' height='220'%3E%3Cfilter id='n'%3E%3CfeTurbulence type='fractalNoise' baseFrequency='0.9' numOctaves='3' stitchTiles='stitch'/%3E%3CfeColorMatrix values='0 0 0 0 0.35 0 0 0 0 0.3 0 0 0 0 0.2 0 0 0 0.11 0'/%3E%3C/filter%3E%3Crect width='100%25' height='100%25' filter='url(%23n)'/%3E%3C/svg%3E");font-family:Patrick Hand,Comic Sans MS,cursive;font-size:20px;line-height:1.4;overflow-x:hidden}img{max-width:100%}h1,h2{font-family:Permanent Marker,Marker Felt,cursive;font-weight:400;margin:0}a{color:inherit}.strip{position:sticky;top:0;z-index:30;display:flex;align-items:center;gap:var(--s3);padding:10px var(--s3);background:#f4eddcf0;border-bottom:3px solid var(--ink);border-radius:0 0 4px 12px/0 0 10px 3px;font-size:17px}.brand{font-family:Permanent Marker,cursive;font-size:24px;text-decoration:none;color:var(--fur-deep);-webkit-text-stroke:1px var(--ink);transform:rotate(-3deg);display:inline-block}.status b{font-family:Kalam,cursive;color:var(--red)}.canary{margin-left:auto;color:var(--ink-soft);white-space:nowrap}.canary b{font-family:Kalam,cursive;color:var(--pen);min-width:3.2em;display:inline-block}.mini-tally{flex:none}.hero{display:grid;gap:var(--s3) var(--s4);padding:var(--s4) var(--s3) var(--s5);max-width:1320px;margin:0 auto;grid-template-columns:minmax(0,1fr) minmax(0,1.35fr);grid-template-areas:"head field" "side field";align-items:start}.hero-head{grid-area:head}.hero-field{grid-area:field;position:relative}.hero-side{grid-area:side;display:flex;flex-wrap:wrap;gap:var(--s3);align-items:flex-start}.pg{margin:0 0 var(--s1);font-family:Kalam,cursive;color:var(--pen);font-size:17px;transform:rotate(-1deg)}h1{position:relative;display:inline-block;font-size:clamp(60px,7.4vw,110px);line-height:.9;color:var(--fur);-webkit-text-stroke:3px var(--ink);paint-order:stroke fill;letter-spacing:2px;text-shadow:5px 6px 0 var(--ear);transform:rotate(-2.5deg);animation:boil .9s steps(3,end) infinite}@keyframes boil{0%{transform:rotate(-2.5deg)}33%{transform:rotate(-2.1deg) translate(1px,-1px)}66%{transform:rotate(-2.8deg) translate(-1px)}}@media (prefers-reduced-motion: reduce){h1{animation:none}}.scrawl{position:absolute;left:2%;right:0;bottom:-18px;width:96%;height:30px;overflow:visible}.scrawl path{fill:none;stroke:var(--red);stroke-width:5;stroke-linecap:round}.scrawl path+path{stroke:var(--purple);stroke-width:3.5}.lede{font-size:clamp(21px,2vw,25px);max-width:30ch;margin:var(--s4) 0 var(--s3)}.actions{display:flex;flex-wrap:wrap;gap:var(--s2);align-items:center}.btn{font:inherit;font-family:Permanent Marker,cursive;font-size:22px;cursor:pointer;text-decoration:none;padding:12px 24px;color:var(--ink);background:var(--gold);border:3px solid var(--ink);border-radius:var(--wobbly);box-shadow:4px 5px 0 var(--ink);transform:rotate(-1.5deg);transition:transform .12s steps(2,end),box-shadow .12s steps(2,end);display:inline-block;touch-action:manipulation}.btn:hover{transform:rotate(1deg) translate(-1px,-2px);box-shadow:6px 7px 0 var(--ink)}.btn:active{transform:translate(3px,4px);box-shadow:1px 1px 0 var(--ink)}.btn:focus-visible{outline:3px dashed var(--pen);outline-offset:5px}.btn.buy{background:var(--fur);color:#fff;-webkit-text-stroke:1px var(--ink);border-radius:var(--wobbly-2);transform:rotate(1.5deg)}.btn.small{font-size:18px;padding:8px 18px}.btn.shook{animation:shake .3s steps(4,end)}@keyframes shake{25%{transform:rotate(-6deg)}50%{transform:rotate(5deg)}75%{transform:rotate(-3deg)}}.hero-field{min-height:600px;border:3px dashed rgba(27,23,18,.35);border-radius:var(--wobbly-2);background:radial-gradient(ellipse 70% 12% at 50% 96%,rgba(238,122,46,.22),transparent 70%)}candy-stash#stash{position:absolute;inset:0}.polaroid{position:absolute;top:-18px;right:18px;z-index:3;margin:0;width:min(34%,230px);background:#fffdf6;padding:10px 10px 6px;transform:rotate(5deg);box-shadow:3px 5px #1b171233;pointer-events:none}.polaroid:before,.taped:before,.taped:after{content:"";position:absolute;width:84px;height:24px;background:#ece2c4cc;border:1px solid rgba(27,23,18,.08)}.polaroid:before{top:-12px;left:50%;transform:translate(-50%) rotate(-4deg)}.polaroid img{display:block;width:100%;height:auto}.polaroid figcaption{font-family:Kalam,cursive;font-size:16px;text-align:center;color:var(--pen)}.hint{position:absolute;left:20px;bottom:6px;margin:0;font-family:Kalam,cursive;color:var(--pen);font-size:16px;transform:rotate(-3deg);pointer-events:none}.fallback{margin:0;padding:var(--s3);font-size:18px;color:var(--ink-soft)}.tally-card{background:#fffdf6;padding:var(--s3) var(--s3) var(--s2);min-width:260px;flex:1 1 260px;max-width:420px;border:3px solid var(--ink);border-radius:var(--wobbly);transform:rotate(1deg);box-shadow:5px 6px #7b4fb859}section{position:relative}.evidence,.rules{max-width:1180px;margin:0 auto;padding:var(--s5) var(--s3)}h2{font-size:clamp(38px,5vw,60px);color:var(--ink);transform:rotate(-1.5deg);display:inline-block}h2 small{font-family:Kalam,cursive;font-size:.4em;color:var(--pen)}.def{font-size:22px;margin:var(--s2) 0 var(--s4);max-width:44ch}.def b{font-family:Kalam,cursive;background:linear-gradient(transparent 55%,#7fb23a73 55%)}.taped{position:relative;margin:0 auto;max-width:980px;transform:rotate(-1.2deg)}.taped img{display:block;width:100%;height:auto;border:3px solid var(--ink);background:var(--paper-2);box-shadow:6px 8px #1b171226}.taped:before{top:-12px;left:8%;transform:rotate(-8deg);z-index:2}.taped:after{top:-10px;right:8%;transform:rotate(6deg);z-index:2}.note{position:absolute;font-family:Kalam,cursive;font-weight:700;font-size:19px;color:var(--pen);background:#f4eddce6;padding:2px 8px;border-radius:6px}.note:after{content:"";position:absolute;width:46px;height:2px;background:var(--pen)}.n1{left:-2%;bottom:-46px;transform:rotate(-3deg)}.n1:after{display:none}.n2{left:34%;top:-44px;transform:rotate(2deg)}.n2:after{left:30%;top:110%;width:2px;height:26px;transform:rotate(-20deg)}.n3{right:-1%;bottom:-48px;transform:rotate(-2deg)}.n3:after{right:40%;bottom:110%;width:2px;height:30px;transform:rotate(25deg)}.rules ol{list-style:none;counter-reset:r;padding:0;margin:var(--s4) 0 0;max-width:760px}.rules li{counter-increment:r;position:relative;padding:10px 0 10px 64px;font-size:clamp(22px,2.4vw,28px);border-bottom:2px solid rgba(27,23,18,.12);border-radius:0 0 40px 2px/0 0 3px 2px}.rules li:before{content:counter(r);position:absolute;left:6px;top:6px;width:42px;height:42px;display:grid;place-items:center;font-family:Permanent Marker,cursive;font-size:24px;border:3px solid var(--ink);border-radius:50% 45% 55% 48%;background:var(--gold)}.rules li:nth-child(2n):before{background:var(--ear);transform:rotate(8deg)}.rules li:nth-child(3n):before{background:var(--purple);color:#fff}.rules li:nth-child(5n):before{background:var(--red);color:#fff}.rules s{text-decoration-color:var(--red);text-decoration-thickness:4px}.stray{position:absolute;width:140px;height:150px}.stray-a{right:0;top:30px}.stray-b{right:4%;top:45%}.take{max-width:1180px;margin:0 auto;padding:var(--s5) var(--s3) var(--s4);display:flex;flex-direction:column;align-items:flex-start;gap:var(--s3)}.chrome{display:flex;flex-wrap:wrap;gap:var(--s2) var(--s3)}.tag{display:inline-flex;align-items:center;gap:10px;text-decoration:none;padding:10px 18px;font-family:Permanent Marker,cursive;font-size:22px;background:#fffdf6;border:3px solid var(--ink);border-radius:var(--wobbly-2);transform:rotate(-1deg);transition:transform .12s steps(2,end)}.tag span{font-family:Patrick Hand,cursive;font-size:17px;color:var(--ink-soft)}.tag:nth-child(2){transform:rotate(1.5deg);border-radius:var(--wobbly)}.tag:hover{transform:rotate(-3deg) scale(1.04)}.tag:focus-visible{outline:3px dashed var(--pen);outline-offset:4px}.buy-tag{background:var(--fur);color:#fff;-webkit-text-stroke:1px var(--ink)}.buy-tag span{color:#fff;-webkit-text-stroke:0}.xmark{width:38px;height:38px;overflow:visible}.xmark .cane{fill:none;stroke:var(--ink);stroke-width:7;stroke-linecap:round}.xmark .cane-stripe{fill:none;stroke:var(--red);stroke-width:4;stroke-linecap:butt;stroke-dasharray:4 4}.xmark .stick{fill:none;stroke:var(--ink);stroke-width:4;stroke-linecap:round}.xmark .pop{fill:var(--purple);stroke:var(--ink);stroke-width:2.5}.xmark .swirl{fill:none;stroke:var(--gold);stroke-width:2}.small-print{font-size:16px;color:var(--ink-soft);margin:var(--s3) 0 0}@media (max-width: 919px){.hero{grid-template-columns:1fr;grid-template-areas:"head" "field" "side";padding-top:var(--s3)}.hero-field{min-height:460px}.stray{position:relative;right:auto;top:auto;width:100%;height:120px;margin-top:var(--s3)}.n1,.n2,.n3{position:static;display:inline-block;margin:var(--s2) var(--s2) 0 0;transform:rotate(-1deg)}.note:after{display:none}.taped{transform:none}}@media (max-width: 560px){body{font-size:18px}.strip{gap:10px;padding:8px 12px;font-size:15px;flex-wrap:wrap}.status{display:none}.brand{font-size:20px}.hero,.evidence,.rules,.take{padding-left:16px;padding-right:16px}.hero-field{min-height:400px}.polaroid{width:36%;right:8px}.rules li{padding-left:54px}.rules li:before{width:36px;height:36px;font-size:20px}.tally-card{min-width:0}.btn{font-size:19px;padding:10px 18px}.tag{font-size:19px}}